She Made A TikTok About Our Breakup Before She Told Me We Broke Up

Let me tell you exactly how I found out, because the order matters.

First, my friend Aiman texted me. Just sent a link with no caption. That's always a bad sign.

It was a TikTok. The creator was Damia. My girlfriend. Or, well — she was my girlfriend when I clicked on it.

Damia is a Ramadan content creator. Not huge, but she has a decent following — sahur routine videos, buka puasa hauls, "what I eat in a day during puasa" content. During Ramadan her posting goes up a lot. So when I saw she'd posted at 11pm, I thought it was just another Ramadan content thing.

It was a "tahajud hour reflection" video. Soft nasheed playing in the background. She was sitting on her sejadah, no makeup, talking quietly like she was journalling out loud. She said something like: "Sometimes you realize that holding on to something is actually what's holding you back. And I've been doing a lot of reflection this Ramadan about what I really want, and the kind of life I want to build. And I think I've finally made peace with a decision I've been avoiding."

Then she looked at the camera and said: "Redha dengan semua yang Allah dah rancang."

No name. No details. But her followers knew. The comments were already figured out by the time I watched it. "Sis you deserve better." "Ramadan is literally the best time for new beginnings." "He didn't deserve your Ramadan energy babe."

200k views. The top comment had 23,000 likes.

She had not texted me. I checked three times.

I texted her: "Damia. Saw your TikTok."

She replied forty minutes later: "Can we talk tomorrow? I'm tired."

I want to be fair here. Damia is not a bad person. For her, TikTok is where she processes things — her anxiety, her family stuff, her faith. She shares everything there. For her, this probably felt like journalling.

But.

There's a difference between processing your feelings and making an announcement before you've had the private conversation. 200,000 people had information about my relationship that I didn't have yet. I found out through a group chat link, not from her.

When we finally talked the next day, she apologised — kind of. She said she didn't mean it as an announcement. She said she was just sharing her reflections. She said she didn't think about how it would land.

I believe her. But "I didn't think about how it would land" is not a small thing when your boyfriend is the last to know.

We ended things properly that afternoon. Or what felt like properly, given the night before.

Her TikTok now has 1.4 million views. I've watched it maybe twenty times. I still don't fully understand why.